STUTTGART, Germany—Military liaison officers throughout Europe are anxiously watching developments after Major Marco Lopez, U.S. Army Europe (USAREUR) liaison to Headquarters, U.S. European Command (HQ USEUCOM), was
FLAVORTOWN — President Donald Trump officially nominated Guy Fieri to fill the new post of Chairman of the Joint Chefs, the White house reported today. "I was speaking with my
WASHINGTON — The Pentagon approved $157 million in modernization costs to make the aging RGM-84 Harpoon missile system yell "DJ Khaled!" before impacting its target, sources report. In what
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — Billy, 6, is an old soul with the wherewithal to call it like he sees it. Recently, he has taken to calling recess his "deployments
DOHA, Qatar — U.S. representatives in continuing talks with the Taliban are confident of finally achieving the illusion of victory in Afghanistan, sources say. Top American negotiator Charles “Charlie” Brown
ENFIELD, Conn. — The LEGO Group has announced a new unlimited edition LEGO set to be released later this year commemorating the conflict in Afghanistan, also known as The Forever War.
HONOLULU, Hawaii — Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard (D-HI) was surprised with deployment orders to Antarctica earlier today, her presidential campaign confirmed. The Democratic presidential candidate has been a unique critical voice against
NEW YORK — The Department of Veterans Affairs breathed a collective sigh of relief after the Metropolitan Correctional Center in New York was named the absolute worst suicide prevention program in
KABUL, Afghanistan – Onlookers were stunned today when Capt. Chad McCarthy, an officer with 4th Psychological Operations Group, provided a realistic capability brief to the task force command and staff to
RAQQA, Syria — The Islamic State (ISIS) has announced it will be retiring it aging fleet of Toyota Hilux "Technicals," which have carried Jihad across the middle east for
KABUL – US Gen. Scott Miller, Commander of the international coalition in Afghanistan, expressed confusion in the wake of the latest bombing in Farah province, which destroyed a bus and killed
WASHINGTON — In his first week as Army Chief of Staff, General James C. McConville emailed a letter to the force outlining his humble suggestion that the army #TryWinning sometime, just
GREENVILLE, S.C. –Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) released a video statement on YouTube today in which he assured voters he would stay in Afghanistan and fight the Taliban after
THE PENTAGON -- Command Sgt. Maj. Michael A. Grinston, the 16th Sgt. Maj. of the Army, told Army Chief of Staff James C. McConville that he’ll “never make it
SOMEWHERE IN SYRIA -- The Islamic State will soon be appointed to head the United Nations subcommittee tasked with abolishing slavery worldwide, according to several people familiar with the matter.
FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. – Specialist Kenny Zweitbester, an infantryman assigned to 3rd Brigade, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), has not skipped leg day since he arrived at the unit nearly two
JOINT BASE LANGLEY-EUSTIS, Va. – Gen. John “Mike” Murray pinned the Bronze Star Medal with “snake eyes” device on Major Dennis Klinefelter today for conspicuous gallantry in the face of overwhelming
THE PENTAGON — Some shitbag colonel working at the Pentagon forgot to make coffee and vacuum the floor before leaving work yesterday, sources have confirmed. Marking yet another fuck-up since he
FORT LEAVENWORTH, Kan. — The US Navy has decided to get in front of some of the SEAL controversies by relocating BUD/S to Fort Leavenworth, home of the Army'
FORT KNOX, Ky. — Facing a downward trend in recruiting numbers, the U.S. armed forces have partnered with Amazon to create the new "1-Click Enlistment" program, allowing high
WASHINGTON — Acting Deputy Defense Secretary Marie Kondo has issued a suggestion for the American people: Thank veterans for the joy they brought them before ultimately discarding them. Popular Japanese minimalist
THE PENTAGON — Starting in fiscal year 2021, the Department of Defense will reduce waste. by banning all single-use plastic explosives. "I directed this policy change after reading a shocking
FORT BENNING, Ga. – Trigger, a military working dog assigned to the 127th Military Police Company, shocked his handlers by coming back from his last deployment with a necklace of enemy
WASHINGTON — A new superweapon being developed by the Pentagon is set to be the first ever weapon able to spread jobs simultaneously throughout all 435 congressional districts. The most lethal
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